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Everything changed. Throughout the past year I have prayed more than ever before. God put me in a specific situation in order to teach me to trust Him and have patience. The more I reflect upon it, the more I am shocked at how blatantly obvious the lesson has been. He led me to leave a school where I was liked and respected by administration, my colleagues, and my students and go somewhere new. Not just a new system, but a WHOLE NEW SYSTEM WITH A BRAND NEW SCHOOL! As in, the school wasn't even complete until the late July. It was quite a ride. Having come around to the resolution of all of that intensity, I can see the road so clearly that He was paving for me. He had a hand in it all. He even had a hand in who would go through it with me. My mother, for one. My mother. My best friend. My confidante. My playmate. My life-long companion. The woman I respect and revere among all women on this planet. We went through this together. I am an only child and for the first four years of my life, she was all I had. She played with me, took care of me, clothed me. Then she brought in my dad and he helped to take care of me and provide for me and support both of us. His girls. So, I see God put us together for a reason. He led us there and had us hold onto one another. I thought we were close before. I didn't think we could get any closer; I was wrong. We are stronger than ever and we have both learned to TRUST and have PATIENCE. We probably were supposed to learn something about worrying, but those lessons never seen to stick with me. I'm a worrywart. So, yesterday changed it all. Turned it all around. We both have been blessed with amazing opportunities for this fall. These opportunities came in His perfect timing. I never understood what that meant -- "His timing" -- until this year. Maggie is in a school that seems to have been made just for her. Jack will go to a daycare we all adore. The people are phenomenal -- and it's so close to Maggie's school!! (Both schools are really close to my parents' house). This is just a dream situation. ... And Spencer and Bill are doing great, too. Thank you to those of you who stuck by us and have encouraged me.
Looking forward to the best school year yet. the best job... Like, a dream situation.
I can't even write more because I'm so shocked and excited and thankful and relieved and fired up. I can't wait to share this journey with you! I just finished this glorious tale. There is a story behind my love for Ann Packer. Years and years ago, when Bill and I first met, we discovered a mutual love of books. I let him borrow a book by Ann Packer.
I was trying to send him a message through the relationship between two of the characters. I wonder if he picked up on it? He never mentioned it, but he also never returned the book, so who knows. Bill says that his father used to tell him NOT to loan out books. If you loan one out, you might as well consider it a gift. When we reconnected years later, I discovered that my sweet Bill STILL HAD THE BOOK! I considered it a sign that he loved me. I was right, as usual. (kidding) Anyway, back to this more recent enjoyable Ann Packer novel, The Children's Crusade follows a family led by its patriarch named BILL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (coincidence -- I didn't read this because of that) and his return from war, his marriage, and his children. Then, each child tells his or her personal story, all revolving around their family. The siblings are all very close and their stories are all intertwined beautifully. Each sibling is strikingly different, and I seemed to relate more to Ryan, although he is much more precious than I. What really stuck me was the mother. She was a PIECE OF WORK. You'll see. Shockingly un-involved... you'll see, you'll see. She made my stomach churn. Here is a recent review for your perusal: http://www.nytimes.com/2015/04/16/books/review-the-childrens-crusade-by-ann-packer.html?_r=0 Enjoy! Let's be real about talking behind each other's backs in a group of friends. We all do it. It's not malicious 98% of the time. It's normally out of concern and/or simply to relay/share information. This was discussed on the recent episode of Real Housewives of New York. During a discussion about talking about Jules, Carole said it was out of concern. So, I started thinking: if it's out of concern, and you would say it to her face, is it okay? I am blessed to have several groups of friends. I've got my work sisters, my dance girls, my college besties, and of course, I have best friends from high school and other areas of life, but for this post, let's talk about the groups. When you are a group, you get together on your own some, but mostly you come together as a unit.
Do you not text one another and say, "Have you talked to (...Suzy) recently?" That's a fishing line. What are you going to respond? I would probably say, "No. Why?" and this friend would relay information, such as "She is coming in town this weekend/getting a divorce/blah blah." To me, this is a normal thing. This isn't malicious at all. What do you think? Is this type of conversation classified as talking behind someone's back? Also, aren't we too old for that crap? If you have an opinion, share it with me. You're my friend. It's not like you're being rude or judgemental. I'm fairly certain my friends talk about me... And it doesn't bother me! I know whatever they're saying is true and if I need to know, they'll tell me. This is not earth-shattering stuff, but the episode did make me think. Until next time... Thanks, Social Media. No, seriously... Thanks. While sitting at home in my pajamas, hair piled on top of my head, watching Food Network, coloring with Maggie and tickling Jack, I can feel 100% guilty that we aren't doing whatever all of my cute mom friends are doing with their kids on Instagram/Facebook/Snapchat. They're at the pool. They're at American Girl. They're at Disney World. They're taking private art lessons with Picasso. They're at the mountains. They're at the beach. They're playing with $500 battery-operated Barbie Mercedes car things. When I see this stuff and I start to feel guilty, I ask Maggie: "Do you want to go to the park?" "No.. I want to color with you here." or I will ask, "Want to go to Chick-fill-A for lunch?" and she'll say... "No. I want a turkey sandwich." .... Also, my sweet mom and dad have an amazing pool. She gets to go swimming at least once a week. Sometimes twice. She loves it. And, if I'm being totally honest here, I'm scared to death to take Jack and Maggie to the pool by myself. He can't even sit up yet and she can't swim without floaties. I see y'all taking 35 kids by yourself and I'm so impressed, but I just can't do it. You even have cute flower shaped sandwiches and hand painted sippy cups. How..? One time I tried to make playdoh at home with Maggie. She said it smelled bad and made her sneeze. #pinterestfail Another time I tried to run and jump in the sprinkler with her and she said the water smelled weird and got in her eyes. I tried? So, in conclusion, I feel simultaneously ashamed that I'm not as awesome as the rest of my mom friends and proud that my kids seem happy and healthy and we are making memories doing the little fun things we do. Please don't get your mom jeans in a wad. I love seeing all of the cool stuff you do with your kids. The best part of social media is the pictures of cute kids, loving spouses, and new babies. It is surely not the political posts. Don't stop the cute stuff. Please! Seriously! Just...let your mascara run just a bit so I can feel better about myself. Just kidding! ... Maybe. And for those of you who feel inadequate like me, THERE WILL BE OTHER SUMMERS when the kids are a little bit bigger and you can take them both on adventures.
You can make memories anytime and anywhere. We are all doing the very best we can. My new mixed media collage is about my favorite topic: books. (More favorite topics: BravoTV and food) I have loved this quote for a long time. It inspired me. My husband asked what the bird has to do with it. I don't know. I just like it. I could say that I was inspired by the feeling of freedom books give readers and that I related that to the feeling a bird has when flying, but that would be untrue. Sounds good, though. It started out like this... Then I started playing with my birdie friends. It was a blast putting everything together. It's like making a casserole. You add something, taste it, and then add something else... Getting close now!! Tada!! I would love for one of you to take this off of my hands and enjoy it for years to come. $45 11X14
This is me. As a teacher, I get to enjoy summers with my children. It's a blessing. It's precious time. Precious moments, if you will. But there are times when I feel like this dog. Sometimes Maggie will say something to me and I will truly have to close my eyes and pray before I respond. When I do this, it throws her for a loop. Sometimes she says, "What are you thinking about me?" She thinks it is about her and I think it's about me. I'm worried I'm making wrong decisions all the time. Macaroni and cheese for breakfast? Sure! It's calcium! And she has to eat something! I do know this: the things I worry about so on Monday, I normally sorta figure out by Thursday. So I'm good. I also have no idea what I'm doing with this 11x14 canvas. I'm just forcing myself to play around. Here's some of what I did tonight: What are you worried about? Maybe we need to embrace the confusion. Maybe we need to look around at one another and realize we all are just living in one big improv exercise.
The drama teacher says, "You're 33. You've got two kids. One just told you to get her juice very forcefully and the other is crying ... GO!" Wondering if other people feel this way.. Let me know. Until next time... Dear friend Jessica asked me to paint her something. This is the 3rd time I've mentioned her on this blog, so I guess I'm, like, totally in love with her or something? Anyway, she requested a Tiffany blue, white, and gold 12x12 canvas. It is super hard to paint for someone else. The whole time I was obsessively thinking IS SHE GOING TO LIKE IT IS SHE GOING TO LIKE IT SHE WONT WANT TO HURT MY FEELINGS SO SHE WONT TELL ME THE TRUTH IS SHE GOING TO LIKE IT OMG. First, I did this. Super boring. Totally doubting my talent. Then, this... I had tried to add some interest or texture. I texted Jess this pic and she was like "ummm... Are you done? How about adding some more paint?" Totally thinking I was done, I replied, "Of course I'm not done! Just wanted to show you!!" 😳 So then, I played around some more and sent this.. She loved it! Yay! So now I just need to varnish and clean up the edges! Yay!
Thanks for your confidence in me, Jess. As usual, you have more faith in me than I have in myself. |
AuthorCarrie Rice lives in Pike Road, AL with her daughter, son, husband, and pug. Archives
April 2017
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